I knew that Moradin was still with me. Else, me spells wouldn't be working.
But, to feel Him in me as I held up His symbol to drive the wretched zombies away, lightened my heart! And drove me onward to battle!
And I think now that I was wrong to leave after the attack those years ago. Might be that I could have helped retake the city sooner. Or eased the hurt of others. But he pain in my heart then left no room for kindness to others. The pain of loosing them both almost ended me.
But the pain has lessened. Perhaps there is room in me heart for ought else but pain now.